Sam wants a FAKE Christmas tree.  I’ve repeatedly had to tell her how FAKE Christmas trees are not allowed in my / our apartment.  FAKE Christmas trees are evil.  They pretty much come to life at night and suck all that is good out of your soul.  FAKE Christmas trees were the original inspiration for transformers.

I cannot abide by a FAKE Christmas tree in our apartment.  I told her it was real of nothing.  I want the pine-e-ness of a real tree.  None of that FAKE Plastic Trees (saddest song ever and Sam wants to relate it to our Christmas).  So we are currently looking for potted small Christmas trees that we can put in our bay window.

Sam is anti-murder so she does not want to cut down a tree.  But I’ve seen her rip down a branch from a live tree before (technically that’s maiming not murder).  So its a potted live tree this year, not a cut down tree.  I’m ok with that.  As long as its not FAKE.