Author: meisaj

Living in the Cleve

Attempt

meisajDaily Life

I’m going to attempt to update my blog in the mornings now.  Part of my morning routine.  For example, its 6:30, I got out of bed half an hour ago, and I have to be in my car driving by 6:45.  So far this morning I’ve shaved, showered, made coffee, washed a bunch of dishes and fed the cats.  That’s fairly productive for a morning (I’ve dressed as well, also important).

But seeing as I can’t remember my weird dream, would actually like to take time to write a proper entry later today or tomorrow morning, and actually put up some pictures or drawings, I’ll just end it by saying Casino Versus Japan is amazing.  You should listen to them.  Try three songs:  Buried, Marilynn Set Me Free, and Wasted Snow.  You can find them all here.

Now to make my lunch, clip my toenails and get out the door.

9/11 thoughts

meisajDaily Life

Its been a while, and rather than summarize everything in the last couple weeks I’ll just write whats on my mind now.

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9/11 is a weird day.  Aside from being Sarah’s birthday (Happy Birthday!!!), I don’t know how I feel about it.

I remember 9/11, Sean and I were at Alena’s house, the last stop on our rather eventful cross-country drive.  Alena woke us up with a “We’re under attack.”  I had no idea what she was talking about until we went downstairs and saw the television.  I remember thinking that Huong, my girlfriend at the time was going to NYU and I had no idea how close she was to the World Trade Centers, but pretty sure she’d be fine.  I wasn’t paralyzed with fear, or freaking out, or even concerned for my own safety.  I did try to get Huong on the phone (which took a long time, but I did eventually talk to her).

I remember being cynical about it.  I mean we were in Erie Pennsylvania, not exactly a high priority target for anyone.  Sean and I didn’t even postpone that leg of our trip.  We still took off and headed to Buffalo, on 9/11.  I had plans to stay in Niagara University with a few friends for a day or two.  I made it there (it took a while, with the US/Canada borders closed trucks were backed up for miles).  I recall talking to my mother, who said if there was a draft keep heading towards Canada (I knew there wouldn’t be a draft).

It wasn’t “a brand new day” in my eyes.  I even remember talking to my then friend Steve (a devout Conservative Republican) who said “aren’t you glad that Gore didn’t get elected now” to which I replied “are you kidding me, do you honestly believe that whoever got elected had any impact on whether or not the attacks took place.”  I mean really, using 9/11 as a vindication for who was president is just sad.

All those memories of that time aside, what do I think now.  9/11 was terrible.  There no debating that.  9/11 was defining.  No debating that.  I dont’ know if 9/11 changed my life.  Really.  I don’t think my life is any different than it would have been had 9/11 not happened.  I think its important to remember that the USA does have enemies out there.  But our enemies are the majority of the population out there.  That a government, group, or enclave of people does not always represent the majority or the will of the people.

Demonizing a religion for what a small few do is ridiculous.

Rights in the USA apply to all citizens, even when you think its in bad taste.

Hatred, and anger should not be motives for changes in society or law.

While I believe the war in Iraq was started under false pretenses and motives, the war in Afghanistan has been a tragedy and I hope for better days for Afghanistan in the future.

The fact that its 9 years later and construction at Ground Zero is still in it infancy and not nearing completion is just sad.

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I won’t forget 9/11/2001.  I won’t forget that we were attacked.  I also won’t forget that many muslims lost their lives in those attacks (no, I’m not talking about the terrorists), alongside of many jews, christians, hindus, atheists and people of other religious beliefs.  And in that moment when they lost their lives they were not defined by their religion, but rather were all people, who died needlessly.

And while I remember them, I won’t use that memory to support my own beliefs, wants or desires.  Nor will I use their memory to deny someone their rights.  Instead I will remember them, solomly, and keep on living my life with purpose that matters to me, because if and when I die, I don’t my memory to be associated with hatred, ignorance, or bigotry.  I don’t want my memory to be used to push an agenda, or to tell someone else that their religious beliefs are wrong, or that their rights, gaurenteed in the Constitution and build into the foundation of this country should be taken away, because someone else doesn’t agree. I would rather someone look at my life and remember me for who I was, a flawed person who tried to live a good life, and remember that life, not my death.

That’s what 9/11 makes me think about.  Not patriotism.  Not loss.  Not a cause or a purpose.  But a reason to keep living my life.  And to remember that there are tragedies, but our country was built to endure tragedies and to prove how our way of life, of basic freedoms for all people to live free, is strong enough to survive.

Musical Kick in the Pants

meisajDaily Life

So I had what I refer to as a musical kick in the pants today.  Its when an old band that you used to love comes flying back in your life for now reason.  Or for a specific reason.

Today Sarah and I were sitting around and doing our thing (she editting photos, me nerding on the computer – nerding is now a recongnized verb in our apartment) and she asks me to put on some Pixies because she wasn’t familiar with them.  So I throw on Death to the Pixies and proceed to find myself singing and humming along with every song.  It is ridiculouls how I know the lyrics to so many songs. Nice useless information.  I love it.

So yeah, I describe as a musical kick to the pants.  Bringing me back to my musical roots.  God I love the Pixies, where have you been in the last year.

St. Patrick’s in August

meisajDaily Life

I had this weird dream that I was celebrating St. Patrick’s Day.  It occured in two locations.

The dream started with me in a crowded bar.  The bar had wooden boothes, was multi-level and crowded.  The only person at the time with me was Matt.  I went to go look for people, and Matt went to do shots with the table next to us.  They weren’t normal shots though.  They were some sort of alcoholic cheese shots (doesn’t sound good now, but looked good in my dream).  Anyways they lined up for shots for Matt and he started chewing his way threw the shots.

I went looking for other people outside on this trail, and joined this group of people looking at a frog.  The frog was largely immobile but got around by sticking to larger animals with its tongue.  I followed the group to a pond under a bridge where an instructor told us all about the frog.  Then the instructor led us inside of a school where he handed us each road flares.  He gave me a lit flare and told me to go in the closet so I could see what it looked like in the dark.  The closet had two doors, and despite me opening a window started filling up with smoke.  People on the the otherside of the second door started asking if I was smoking in there.

I got annoyed, left and went back to the bar.  There I found Pat and Jen Lafleur (a girl I went to high school with).  Both were heading to the bathroom, and I headed to the bar.  I asked for a Guinness, and Pat came up behind me.  I remember having to pay for my drink before she poured it (it was two bucks for a Guinness, good deal).  I told Pat to order while the bartender (a woman) was there.  Pat didn’t want Guinness, he wanted some drink that started with an A, Alkazam or something of the sort.  He paid for his drink and she got him his glass and started to walk away.  I caught her and reminded her I hadn’t had my Guinness yet.  She laughed and pulled out this gallon pitcher and filled it half way.  I started saying “Holy shit Pat, all this for $2.”  To celebrate we did shots (regular shots, Jameson I believe).  We then headed back to our area (where the dream started).

On the walk back I passed Alan Hutchinson, and remember thinking he looked good and was doing well, but didn’t talk to him.  I don’t even think he recognized me.  When we got back Dan was lined up to do cheese shots.  We all laughed as he was doing his shots (at this point our group consisted of Matt, Pat, Dan, Jen Lafleur, Derek and myself).  Weird that Jen was in with a group of my college friends.

And then I woke.  The strangest part of this dream is that I swear I was half awake for the whole thing.  It was after I had woken up at 2 am, and was laying in bed with my eyes closed, but heard the AC, heard the ferret scrambling in her cage, heard everything going on in the bedroom the whole time of the dream.  It was definitely strange, but I also think that’s what allowed me to remember most of the dream.

Watches

meisajDaily Life

It always amuses me how one little thing you see can make you recall your dreams. This morning I went to grab my wristwatch (I’ve been alternating between my wristwatch and my pocket watch lately) and my dream came rushing back to me, or at least part of my dream.

The part I remember is looking down at my wrist and seeing that my watch was on upside down (or backwards). The 12 was facing my body instead of away from my body. I took it off, oriented it the right way, and put it back on, only to find it on backwards again. No matter how many times I took it off to fix it, the watch was always backwards.

That’s it. That’s all I remember. But like I said, very cool that one thing brings a dream back into focus.

Cleveland Police, WTF

meisajDaily Life

Yesterday during my rush hour trip home two Cleveland Police cars got on the highway in front of me at the West 6th street ramp.  They were about 6 cars in front of me.  They immediately pulled parallel to each other, one in each of the lanes, and then put on their flashers and slowed to 40 miles an hour.

Everyone slammed on there brakes as there was no warning, and traffic immediately started backing up behind them (and well behind me).  I had hoped, maybe, they were doing this because there was an accident up ahead I didn’t know about.  That made sense in my mind.  What didn’t make sense is when they got to the Whiskey Island exit, turned off their flashers and pulled off the highway and slowly drove towards the Edgewater park parking lot.

If there was an emergency or accident why were they going well below the speed limit.  At any given moment they were 10 mph or more below the speed limit.  And why did they shut off their lights as soon as they pulled off the highway and proceed even slower to the parking lot.  And if there wasn’t an emergency that means they were just being dicks and wanted to fuck with rush hour traffic.  I wasn’t close enough to read the numbers on their cars, but I was close enough to be extremely pissed at their meaningless actions.