Things I've been told recently:

I'm important.
I have banging eyelashes.
Mean AJ comes out when I'm teaching (what she meant was I was strict about rules).
I'm not crazy.
I'm a little out there.
I've had interesting people in my life.
I'm fun to work with.
My cat is cute.
My cat feels emasculated due to his purple collar (that's paraphrased).
Why would you tell someone that?
I'm sorry.
I can't say I'm sorry.
Wait a minute.
Go ahead.
Please.